heart shaped rocks

Yesterday we found a heart shaped 

rock as we

hiked along. 

 

And of course I thought of 

you. 

how could I not?

you, who lived and laughed and loved

in a way that was vast, 

expansive even.

 

Last night, I cried as I read the story 

of another motherless

girl

and ached as I sobbed, not really knowing 

why

and as quickly as it came, the

raw hurt rolled away and 

left me feeling alone and

motherless

without you in this 

big scary world. 

 

You won’t be here, 

to go walking and talking with me,

locking eyes as you share

stories of your past, of the 

life you lived when you were my age

running wild in the streets of LA. 

 

How did you, a gal raised in the suburbs of a 

concrete jungle, 

become so completely captured by 

the wild of California?

 

Did the mighty, solemn sequoias 

ground your uncertain spirit?

or did the secluded alpine lakes

tease you ever more near?

perhaps the sure, strong Sierras

intrigued you with their grandeur?

did you catch a glimpse of God out there?

 

Have you always collected these

heart shaped rocks?

what did they mean to you?