Ask me about my mother

You might never have met her, it’s sad but it’s quite true. But you would’ve loved her, trust me, most people do. She had the most radiant smile and oh my soul, her laugh filled up whole rooms. She always wanted a house with a crowded table, a place set for anyone and everyone.

She was full of life and was true to herself, to my chagrin at times, but she loved being silly, not taking herself too seriously, and making us all a bit embarrassed.

One of our last activities we did as a family before her brain tumors showed up was pick trash off the side of the road for Earth Day. That’s just what she did–she wasn’t a sort of passive bystander in life

 

She wasn’t perfect, we certainly had our tiffs. But she lived life with heart. She got mad, she laughed loudly, swore occasionally and was always ready for a hug–something I was never eager to give. She liked to listen to Fleetwood Mac and Cat Stevens but was truly terrible at singing. Mom loved the color purple (the color, not the book but she probably would’ve loved the book too). She worked as a raft guide, on a ranch, at a ski school, as a backpacking trip leader, at Kohl's and at a pre-school too. Debbie (her name, I might add) was in a sorority at UCLA –a delta zeta for life. She was a teacher and a coach and an athletic director, too. She was a librarian and had two partially finished master's degrees. She dreamed of being a counselor yet neither of those degrees was for counseling.

She always put berries and whip cream on her waffles and got curry on her white shirts. She was competitive, oh how she hated losing, but she brought people together, erasing divisions wrought by time and space, bringing an authentic interest in others with her wherever she went. She teased and poked fun with reckless abandon. 

 

She died a horrible death, but I’d say she lived a beautiful life, full of bright colors, risks and winding paths, big smiles, detours and rides in a convertible with the top down.

 

So please, ask me about my mother, I wish you could’ve met.